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TWO DANCERS
 
THE FUN POWDER PLOT

When we turn up in our turn up’s, our hearts are heavy, our heads are ready to levy. For the yippee-less swing, for the tot-less cot, for the mock, for the shock, for the fun powder plot. With courage and conviction, in donkey-jaw diction, we cry for the cause because the courts have left us lonely; disowned us daddies like the poopers of the party. Gently, gently take them from me… gently, gently take them from me…gently, gently take them from me, and I’ll be left dumfound as a donkey. This is a booty call; my boot up your arse hole. This is a Freudian slip; my slipper in your bits.

HOOTING & HOWLING

Carry me hooting and howling to the river to wash of my hands of the hot blood, the sweat and the sand. Any rival who goes for our girls will be left thumb sucking in terror and bereft of all coffin bearers. A crude art, a bovver boot ballet- equally elegant and ugly. I was as thrilled as I was appalled, courting him in fisticuffing waltz. Now I’m not saying the lads always deserve a braying. And I’m not saying the girls are worth the fines I’m paying. We’re just brutes bored in our bovver boots. We’re just brutes clowning ‘round in cahoots. We’re just brutes looking for shops to loot. We’re just brutes hoping to have a hoot…Hooting, hooting and howling.

ALL THE KING'S MEN

Watch me! watch me!/the belle of the ball/my heart, my hand and everything I own/and we are the boys/with new shiny shoes/we’ve seen ‘em all/and we’ve chosen you/now no one will find your limit/girls from Roedean/girls from Shipley/girls from Hounslow/girls from Whitby/you’re a candied queen/and let me show my darling what that means/watch me! watch me!/hatch me! hatch me!/a girl before/bouncing round behind the bedroom doors/and we are the boys/who’ll drape you in jewels/cut off your hair/and throw out your shoes/cause baby, you won’t need them, where you’ll be/girls astride me/girls beneath me/girls before me/girls between me/you’re birthing machines/and let me show my darling what that means/hatch me! hatch me!/and baby, turns out I’m evil/in all my dreams, girls who’ll clothe me/girls who’ll feed me/girls who want me/girls who need me/all you pretty things waiting for somebody/number my babies and my broken body

WHEN I'M SLEEPY

.…When I’m sleepy, needing supper, you’re the lips for me to pucker. When I’m sleepy, needing supper, you’re the lips.

WE STILL GOT THE TASTE OF DANCIN' ON OUR TONGUES

Kick! The spirit kicks, but the moonshine plays cheap tricks. Us kids are cold and cagey rattling around the town, scaring the oldies into their dressing gowns, as the dribbling dogs howl. What’so wrong with just a little fun? We still got the taste dancin’ on our tongues. When we pucker up our lips are bee-stung. We still got the taste dancin’ on our tongues. We got gusto, we are headstrong. We still got the taste dancin’ on our tongues. Fill our bellies and we fill our lungs. We still got the taste dancin’ on our tongues. Darling the spirit is kicking, don’t be fooled by the moonshine, it’s tricking. Frock spill like alcho-pop around girls’ knees. Trousers and blouses make excellent sheets, down dimly lit streets. Why should we feel bad for what we’ve done? We still got the taste dancin’ on our tongues. Love the smash and grab of our goings on. We still got the taste dancin’ on our tongues.

TWO DANCERS (I)

I feel as if I’ve been where you have been/the snow had piled up knee-high in the street/apart, apart/and dancing on/the wanderer/the squanderer/our son was dying and we could hardly eat/they dragged me by the ankles through the street/(two hearts)/they passed me round them like a piece of meat/his hairy hands/his falling fists/his dancing cock/down by his knees/I’ve seen my children turn away from me/O, do you want my bones between your teeth?/they pulled me half-alive out of the sea/apart, apart/and dancing on/impossible/impossible/I feel as if I’ve been where you have been/I feel as if I’ve been where you have been

TWO DANCERS (II)

O, do you want my heart between your teeth?/your hands are curling up like floating leaves/you who shall deserve/you who shall deserve/O, unpluckable flower of the moon!/O, untetherable bird of the blue!/you who shall deserve/you who shall deserve/deserters!/deserters!/deserters!/ deserters!/the neighbours cup their ears to the walls/two hearts/no more

THIS IS OUR LOT

By smirking prank of fate, we find ourselves dancing late, like young reprobates. By the milky light of the mighty moon, find someone to nuzzle to, and waltz from the room. We’re all quiffed and cropped, this is our lot, we hold each other up heavy with hops. By smirking prank of fate we wiggle and kick like bobbing bate, and wait for a bite. By the milky light of the mighty moon, find someone to nuzzle to, and waltz from the room. We’re all quiffed and cropped, this is our lot, we hold each other up heavy with hops. My darling, my dumpling, my plump hearts a’ thumping- begging you to come to me. I couldn’t be more ready, I COULDN’T BE MORE READY. A glottal stop. Bottled up. Waiting for the penny drop.

UNDERBELLY

How the prayer rubs the rosary. How the make up make her face pretty. Oh how we have an underbelly, bitten by brutality. How there’s guts fried up. How lothario leers at slut. Oh how we have an underbelly, bitten by brutality. And how in our first and last years we are the most needy, least greedy, most grateful, least hateful. How die as deeply doe-eyed as we start.

EMPTY NEST

Did I judge this wrong?/but you had it all/you had it all/a gift of the gods/in your city of gold/and you’ll piss it all/you had it all/and what drags the rope/you know, or, you don’t/you had it all/gonegonegonegone/goinggoinggone/the day you moved off/the whole village mourned/love’s no kind of joke/or something small/and where will you go?/there’s things you don’t know/fingers tearing your clothes/baby ungrown/you had it all/gonegonegonegone/goinggoinggone/and suffering alone/your bowl emptied out/all your secrets known/I welcome your call/these walls don’t fall.

THROUGH THE IRON GATE

Through the iron gate, and he’s gone. See the goslings, the ducklings, the piglets, the lambs he lets out a little sob. Sometimes he’d still wish that he slept in a cot by his Mum and Dad’s bed. He cry NO. “I’m left here, and I’m here on my own.” Hear the leaves soft lift hush, make him blush. Pair of welly boots, the crows in cahoots, the eggs on the hob, the corns on their cobs, he let out little sob. Sometimes he’d still wish that he left, shot through like a bolt into mad heifer’s head. He cry NO. “I’m left here, and I’m here on my own.” Sometimes he’d still wish that he left, shot through like a bull. But NO.

 
 
LIMBO, PANTO
 
VIGIL FOR A FUDDY DUUDY

Room a catacomb, this ghoul a balloon, with the breath
from beneath your breast, yes that is best.

Hug it to me, and the rubber raspberries,
with wantingly wet mouth I suck... remind me of your gentle fuck.

Men to be men, must love and pity
so deeply and secretly.

Flaccid, I asked for this
bellow spit rich belly pit moan and blush with hot hormone.

Wash it from me, this stuff sad and sticky
blub into the soapsuds, trim my ‘tache and pull the plug.

Men to be men, must love and pity
so deeply and secretly.

How you'd smother me, wetly whisper what you'd like
and we'd be clumsy as virgins in vigil light

THE CLUB OF FATHOMLESS LOVE

Oh when I’m olden I’ll hear this moment and I’ll laugh hahaha…
I’ve rallied, rucked over and rabble roused have I not?
I’ve given lung, tongue and sung have I not?
I’ve meant what I’ve said and I’ve slept in soiled bed have I not?
With a heart as big as a dustbin lid have I not? HAVE I NOT?

But I’m not a soft touch and I won’t be seen as such, so full with…
fierce fathomless love, I spit and have spats to be tough,
show I’m not soppy and stuff…

Though as a boy I had bowl-cut brilliance that could carve up
any conundrum,
but now dunno how that could possibly have been.

I’ve shorn and I’ve sheened and I’ve Brylcreemed have I not?
I’ve brawn and I’ve brain and of both I’ve shame have I not?
Though I’ve had them straddle me wantingly have I not?
And I’ve length of loinly manliness have I not? HAVE I NOT?

But I’m not a soft touch and I won’t be seen as such, so full with…
fierce fathomless love, I spit and have spats to be tough,
show I’m not soppy and stuff…

Though as a boy I had bowl-cut brilliance that could carve up
any conundrum,
but now dunno how that could possibly have been.

With bodies rid of retarding midweek hardship,
we bellow baritone to our favourites, like life depends on it!
I hold my brothers in breathtaking clinches
this is my heart’s hub, the hot, wild, fug of the club of fathomless love,
I spit and have spats to be tough, show I’m not soppy and stuff…

Though as a boy I had bowl-cut brilliance that could carve up
any conundrum,
but now dunno how that could possibly have been.

THE DEVIL'S CRAYON

This truly is
the Devil's crayon
tracing your shoulderblades
aglow like rayon

this truly is the Devil's crayon
that all his children can use to draw

and we are so many tiny pieces
We are so many tiny pieces

This truly is
the Devil's answer
carved from the tongue
of this romancer

this truly is the Devil's answer
that all his children use to kiss

and we are so many clambering hands
We are so many clambering hands

the way you say her name
I want mine said the same, devil
devildevildevil
the way you say her name I want mine said the same
devil

This truly is
the Devil's shoulder
your arm draped around
ten times over

this truly is the Devil's shoulder
that all his children will use to throw their loads, their loads on you
to throw their loads on you

And we are so much moulded dough
We are so much moulded dough

Used to throw their loads on you
Used to throw
their loads on you.

WOEBEGONE WANDERERS

Unstable stands aflush with fans
pilfered pies and pints in wobbly hands…
in the bowls of the bar two boys spar
don’t flinch an inch and territories marked

Oh I’d swear by my own cock and balls
and the family home’s four walls

There’ll be no treason this season.
The players they bask.
The boss he basks.
Just win the big match it’s all I can ask.

Darrell my son the bastards won
we’ve been lumbered with losing life for far too long…
the ground groans like the belly of a sleeping whale
don’t flinch an inch you’ll be released on bail

Oh I’d swear by my own cock and balls
And the family home’s four walls

There’ll be reason for treason this season.
The players are slack.
The boss has been sacked.
Just win the big match it’s all I can ask.

Woebegone with weeping
that sets you down to sleeping…
please canary, please be wary
the pit of a man’s heart is dark and scary

Oh are yer yellow with cowardice?
Or are yer yellow with jaundice?

A slap on the arse from my baby,
the hiss and the sting
and the mark of a ring
and the cold reality.

Who are yer? Who are yer? Who are yer? Who are yer?

THE OLD DOG

Casual sex with a hard up thug
shifting good time drugs and...
 
A human is hauled
from the wombs
wired jaw.
 
We are liberal
and
We are civil
and
Life is futile
 
Darling I regret there's
life in the old dog yet.

PLEASE, SIR

Come to from slumber on bed’s soft tundra
murky with mourn beside dead uniform
and I wish and I hope
and I wish and I hope
with long drag on me smoke
and I wish and I hope
that I’ll stalk the corridors once more.
 
Please, Sir let me return, if only for a term (how I yearn)
It’s glee, Sir, with your hot breath upon me (gob gurning in fury)
 
But…
I only winded that lad before he bolted
and…
I only fumbled that lass, besides, I was revolted
 
So for forgiveness,
with me boyz as witness,
take these chips with cheese
as an offering of peace
But…
I only winded that lad before he bolted
and…
I only fumbled that lass, besides, I was revolted
 
So for forgiveness,
with me boyz as witness,
take these chips with cheese
as an offering of peace

HIS GRINNING SKULL

How can you pine anymore?
It is beautiful
and for all
unavoidable

so these are his bones
and his grinning skull
so now he is home
to the bluebottles

he who was your bull
and made the shadows run

and I understand
In all things he was quite the man

but now perched on his skull
he now wears cuckold's horns
and they're growing full
pushing through the soil

pools gathering round my knees
temptation leers at me from every door

so these are his bones
why won't you leave them alone?

worms crowding her feet
trying to pull me back to their holes
tap-tapping in the room below
nothing more than dead piles of bones

saying:
"I'll eat this young whelp's heart I will"
"I'll eat this young whelp's heart I will"
"I'll eat this young whelp's heart"

HEAVE-HO
HEAVE-HO

with fists for spades we raid his grave
with big black boots we stomp the roots
with fists for spades we raid his grave
with big black boots we stomp the roots

and HEAVE-HO
HEAVE-HO
HEAVE-HO
HEAVE-HO

HEAVE-HO

heave-ho

SHE PURRED, WHILE I GRRRED

Her fruit was ripe, I bit
Her fruit was ripe, I bit
I’m nothing more than a humble mongrel
whippet cast, rash and unabashed

Her fruit was ripe, I bit
Her fruit was ripe, I bit
pungent juice wept from the bruise
where the skin was sluice and slobbered on

though the meat was fleshy and sweet…
she purred, while I grrred

I die every day, to live every night
under the industry of her want for me in our fusty foundry
please no ceremony, I want she, I want she, not matrimony

My fruit was ripe, she bit
My fruit was ripe, she bit
in her belly lay a pip
a’brooding in the oozing

My fruit was ripe, she bit
My fruit was ripe, she bit
huffing and puffing on the mattress stuffing
upon the bunk a fervent funk

in my butcher’s hands her soft fruit tendered, She never pretended…
she purred while, I grrred

I die every day, to live every night
under the industry of her want for me in our fusty foundry
please no ceremony, I want she for laundry, I want she so I’m not lonely
I want she, I want she, not matrimony

BRAVE BULGING BUOYANT CLAIRVOYANTS

c’mon we’re young, we’re young
yet we’ll be dead as soon
c’mon we came, we came
from our mother’s womb to swoon
Brave Bulging Buoyant Clairvoyants
Adopting this young spirit of sin
To make the most, before we turn to ghost
Before, old friend, life’s just a means to an end
To make the most, before we turn to ghost
swig the bottle, bottle
slap the face of Aristotle 
race me, race me, race me, race me
in yer fourth hand jalopy
Brave Bulging Buoyant Clairvoyants
Adopting this young spirit of sin
To make the most, before we turn to ghost
Before, old friend, life’s just a means to an end
To make the most, before we turn to ghost
my mother, she said, “you don’t delve in taboo”
but mother, my moribund will come
when I’m through with taboo
Brave Bulging Buoyant Clairvoyants
Adopting this young spirit of sin
To make the most, before we turn to ghost
Before, old friend, life’s just a means to an end
To make the most, before we turn to ghost

That sink and pull in the guts
That’s this foolhardy flux

CHEERIO CHAPS, CHEERIO GOODBYE

Sour metal smells in a lonely barrel
don't render me the sorriest parody...

Potty gobbed fickle mob clamour for climax
don't render me the sorriest parody...

Be blasted or be lambasted instead
don't render me the sorriest parody...

cheerio chaps, cheerio goodbye
cheerio chaps, even cheer me if I die

For me snivellin’, for me sufferin’, for me constant cowerin’
I get this…
My pain played back, like crude happy slap, and for the laff
I get this…
Another cosmos, beneath the big top, when I belly flop
I get this…

no not hugged or hand shook,
just left bereft, well walloped, wanting to have warwhoopfully have wept

So I gloat, with gritted grin
To cheat my chin into keeping the womanly wibbling in

cheerio chaps, cheerio goodbye
cheerio chaps, even cheer me if I die

For me snivellin’, for me sufferin’, for me constant cowerin’
I get this…
My pain played back, like crude happy slap, and for the laff
I get this…
Another cosmos, beneath the big top, when I belly flop
I get this…

a requiem in a circus tent.

 
 
 
 
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28/01/2010 - BYRON BAY, NSW Great Northern Hotel
29/01/2010 - BRISBANE, QLD Laneway Festival SOLD OUT
30/01/2010 - MELBOURNE, VIC Laneway Festival SOLD OUT
31/01/2010 - SYDNEY, NSW Laneway Festival SOLD OUT
01/02/2010 - SYDNEY, NSW Oxford Art Factory
04/02/2010 - MELBOURNE, VIC East Brunswick Club
06/02/2010 - PERTH, WA Laneway Festival
10/02/2010 - LOS ANGELES, CA Troubadour **
11/02/2010 - SAN FRANCISCO, CA Independent **
13/02/2010 - PORTLAND, OR Doug Fir Lounge **
14/02/2010 - SEATTLE, WA Chop Suey **
17/02/2010 - MINNEAPOLIS, MN 7th Street Entry **
18/02/2010 - CHICAGO, IL Schubas **
19/02/2010 - CHICAGO, IL Schubas **
20/02/2010 - DETROIT, MI Pike Room **
22/02/2010 - TORONTO, Ontario Horseshoe Tavern **
24/02/2010 - BOSTON, MA Great Scott **
25/02/2010 - PHILADELPHIA, PA Kung Fu Necktie **
26/02/2010 - NEW YORK, NY Bowery Ballroom **
27/02/2010 - WASHINGTON, DC Black Cat **
28/02/2010 - BROOKLYN, NY Music Hall Of Williamsburg **
03/03/2010 - PORTSMOUTH Wedgewood Rooms *
04/03/2010 - LONDON KOKO* SOLD OUT
11/03/2010 - WARWICK Warwick Un *
12/03/2010 - BOURNMOUTH 60 Million Postcards *
13/03/2010 - LEICESTER Uni Queens Hall *
15/03/2010 - NORWICH Waterfront *
16/03/2010 - EXETER Phoenix *
18/03/2010 - LIVERPOOL Academy 2 *
19/03/2010 - NEWCASTLE Cluny * SOLD OUT
20/03/2010 - MANCHESTER Academy 2 *
22/03/2010 - LONDON KOKO w/Everything Everything + Esben And The Witch
25/03/2010 - GALWAY Roisin Dubh
26/03/2010 - CORK Cyprus Avenue
27/03/2010 - DUBLIN Academy
01/04/2010 - NANCY L'autre Canal
02/04/2010 - LYON Epicerie Moderne
03/04/2010 - MARSEILLE Cabaret Aletoire
04/04/2010 - GRENOBLE Le Ciel
06/04/2010 - LAUSANNE Le Romandie
07/04/2010 - ST GALLEN Theater Palace
08/04/2010 - MAYRHOFEN Snowbombing
09/04/2010 - BOLOGNE Locomotiv
10/04/2010 - ROME MIT Festival
11/04/2010 - ROME MIT Festival
12/04/2010 - MILAN Magnoli
13/04/2010 - MUNICH Kranhalle
15/04/2010 - PARIS Maroquinerie
16/04/2010 - BRUSSELS Botanique
17/04/2010 - COLOGNE Gebaude 9
19/04/2010 - HAMBURG Uebel and Gefarlich
20/04/2010 - BERLIN Lido
27/05/2010 - SPAIN Primavera Festival
28/05/2010 - SPAIN Primavera Festival
29/05/2010 - SPAIN Primavera Festival

* with Erland & The Carnival, and Lone Wolf
** with Still Life Still

 
 
 
 
 
 
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